Showing posts with label Super Bowl. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Super Bowl. Show all posts

Thursday, February 7, 2008

OK, I'm ready to talk about it


I don’t expect you to understand.

A sports franchise can easily go an entire generation or longer without a championship. Plenty have. Boston franchises have been very successful lately, and with such a large and vocal following, the rest of the county has had to listen to New England fans tout the recent success – and bemoan the previous failings – of their teams for the better part of this decade. And hearing other people blowing their own horn for nearly ten years is really fucking annoying. I get this.

So I know that you don’t understand.

The New England Patriots got caught spying on opponents. They were accused of running up the score on opponents. Their quarterback is a GQ cover boy who dates super models and left another girlfriend pregnant. I get why people dislike this team. I get why people were rooting for the underdog Giants in Super Bowl XLII.

With a little perspective, however, you may look at things differently, if only slightly. For example, did you know that for decades the Patriots were the laughingstock of the AFL and then NFL? That the Jets and the Dolphins used to come into Fenway Park (where they once played) and then later the junk heap that was Schaffer/Sullivan/Foxboro Stadium and run up the score all over the hapless Patsies? Did you know that for decades, the joke ran that if a crime was committed in eastern Massachusetts, the first place the cops looked for suspects was the Patriots’ locker room? That their two prior Super Bowl appreances ended expectedly with them representing sacrificial lambs at the alters of the Mighty ’86 Bears and ’96 Brett Favre Coronation?

The Patriots were – in short – an embarrassment for many, many years. Then, in Super Bowl XXXVI, after the St. Louis Rams came out individually, shaking their butts and hollering to the crowd as their names were called, the announcer said: “The New England Patriots have requested that they be announced as a team. So, lady’s and gentlemen, the New England Patriots.” And nothing has been the same since.

I don’t expect everyone to suddenly turn around and join New England fans in weeping for history lost. I get why you don’t like the Patriots. But all things considered, this wasn’t so much the slaying of Goliath as the slaying of the Bad News Bears. The Patriots are not so much the Yankees as the Major League version of the Cleveland Indians. It’s just been spread out over a few years rather than one season.

So now this incarnation of the Patriots, which scored more points and broke two kinds of touchdown records, goes down as chokers rather than The Best Team Ever. They had a great year and blew it when it mattered. For the rest of the country, it’s an historic upset and reason to cheer. For Patriots fans, it kind of just feels like old times.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Game Prediction Wrong, Simmons Prediction on the Money

That Patriots jersey at your restaurant not lookin so good these days, eh Senior?

It's just all too easy. Two posts down it was prognositcated that BS would reference his lucky Welker jersey and the Larry Bird Celtics in his next column. Per today's ESPN Sports Guy column:
Much like the Patriots, I choked heading into the weekend: Somehow, I
forgot to pack my good-luck Wes Welker jersey and headed to Sunday's game
without any Pats gear.

...

Anyway, the Patriots won their two playoff games and set the stage for
another great father-son sports moment in a lifetime of great father-son sports
moments. We went to the triple-OT Suns-Celts game together in 1976. We went to
Games 5 and 7 of the Sixers-Celtics series in '81. We saw the Celtics clinch
titles in '84 and '86, and we saw the game when Bird stole the ball from
Isiah.

Sorry Bill. Just put some Bravery on your ipod, watch Rounders a couple more times and call me in the morning.


I'll write about it when I'm ready

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Perfectville, Population (still): 1

What a game, and what a huge upset of the Patriots! Rather than blogging myself, here is '72 Dolphin Mercury Morris for his reaction:



Sorry Mr. Belichick, your application has been reviewed by the Perfectville Homeowners Association, and been denied.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Super Picks

And now the moment you’ve all been waiting for: Super Bowl XLII predictions from two Chargers fans and a Boston Grrrl!

Liz’s Pics

Winner: Patriots
By how much: 5 points
Company with the best commercial: Apple Computers
Number of relentlessly advertised new Fox shows that will be cancelled before their 5th episode: 4
Accidentally exposed body parts at half time: 1, Tom Petty’s bald head. His hat will come off, revealing he’s been wearing one of those hair-attached-to-hat wigs for 17 years.


Red’s Pics

Winner: Patriots.
By how much: 15 points
Company with the best commercial: Pepsi
Number of snarky comments I will make about Ryan Seacrest to cover the fact I am actually totally in love with him: 50
On a scale of 1-10, how bad will Paula Adbul suck in her pre-game performance even though it was pre-recorded: 11



Dave’s Pics

The Victor: Patriots
Score: 31-24
Player who suddenly decides to suck just ‘cause they’re playing in the Super Bowl: Giant’s running back Brandon Jacobs. He’s pulling a Stephen Davis for sure.
Odds that Bill Simmons references his lucky Wes Welker jersey and the Larry Bird era Celtics in his next column: 2 to 1. Jersey possibly still at dry-cleaners due to J-Bug love stains.

Best commercials that didn’t make the cut: Michael Vick for PetSmart and Pacman Jones' “Got a Little Captain in You” spot.
Innovative new feature in Fox coverage: Hiring of computer-animated football named Booter to explain intricacies of game in an entertaining fashion. Rupert Murdoch denies rumors of nepotistic favors and/or blackmail by ex-baseball analyst, Scooter.
Tom Petty half-time show surprise: “Fog Machine Malfunction” during Last Dance with Mary Jane, coupled with the setting of the all-time Super Bowl record for Churo sales
Aggravating compulsive gambler’s moment of the game: Patriots cover the spread after Belichick calls for Matt Cassell to Junio Seau touchdown pass with one second on the clock.


And there you have it, Patriots across the board! That means they have to win, right? Right?!? I'm going to go throw up now.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Do I Have to Watch?


I'm torn about the Super Bowl...on one hand, I'm tired of New England winning everything. On the other, I hate Eli Manning. Since he refused to come play in San Diego (and had 60,000 people scream "Eli Sucks" for 3 hours the first time he played at Qualcomm), I've loathed his stupid ugly face. I really hope he loses abysmally and has to spend years regaining his confidence and remaining inferior to his older brother. Which, I guess, means I'm rooting for the Patriots. Geez. I just feel dirty...if Seacrest weren't "hosting" the Super Bowl (whatever the hell that means) I might skip the game all together...

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Daily Rant


According to Variety, Ryan Seacrest will serve as "Master of Ceremonies" at the Super Bowl this coming year in Arizona. Really? Does anyone else find this disturbing? Does Fox really think they need more American Idol cross promotion? I can think of about a million reasons this is a horrible idea. I mean, c'mon! Ryan Seacrest is king of the metrosexuals. I realize this is 2007, but football is still about as testosterone-y as it gets. I can't really imagine Seacrest is a believable host for such an event. I'm a chick and I wouldn't even ask Seacrest about football. Teeth whitening and fashion tips, maybe, but football?!? I don't think so.