Thursday, November 8, 2007

Chinga Te, El Maddon!


As many of you know, there is a long, star-studded list of NFL players that have fallen victim to the so-called "Madden Curse." From Garrison Hearst's grizzy ankle fracture in the playoffs to Shaun Alexander's injury-riddled, underachieving season in 2006, he who adorns the cover of the famed EA sports video game basically gets screwed. Any if we had known about this, we wouldn't have even bothered with an election:

Say Chowder!

With this year's cover boy, Vince Young, clearly immune to any kind of bad fortune (I mean, the guy wins basically every game while throwing for 60 yards and two interceptions), the curse had to befall another unfortunate individual.

And this past week the Madden Gods struck down Chargers defensive end Luis Castillo, who glossed this year's first edition of "Madden Espanol," where everything from game menus to announcing is in Spanish. Last week against the Vikings, Castillo tore tendons in his right ankle, and is expected to miss six weeks, if not more. The struggling Chargers need all the help they can get, and now who knows if they have the manpower to even make the playoffs. At least Chiefs running back Larry Johnson looks like he'll be hanging out with Jay-Z for the rest of the year instead of playing NFL Football due to injury, so the Bolts (believe it or not), are still in the driver's seat when it comes to the AFC West.

EA Sports, if you're reading this, here are some suggestions to for next year's El Maddon cover: Brett Favre, Tom Brady, Bill Belichik, Al Davis, Champ Baily. ALL Latino, swear to god.

4 comments:

Red said...

Aye Dios mio!

Dave H said...

Watching the Chargers this year gives me a dolor de f*cking everything.

Bill Simmons said...

Dave, do you want to come over to my house to play. You can be Tom Brady and I can be the Tight End. I hope to be your number one receiver. Tee Hee

Dave H said...

Anonymous commentors are a sick breed.

I know this is you, San-Jizz, just because you have such fantasies about Peter King and Ray Ratto, don't take them out on this board.